Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Parody
by Descendant of Truth
Summary: When only Aqua succeeds in the Mark of Mastery, Terra looks for advice from Xehanort, who is totally not a villain. Aqua and Terra go on a long, dangerous quest with Ven not far behind. Their journey is made even longer when Ventus continuously gets distracted, Aqua is frequently driven up the wall and Terra keeps getting manipulated. A parody Birth by Sleep. No pairings.
1. The Bonding

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Disney, Square Enix, or any of their products, including characters, names of places, etc. All rights belong to their respective owners.

* * *

In a place called Destiny Islands, there lived many individuals. These individuals liked to call themselves, "a population." But some people thought that the idea of "population" was stupid and entirely uncalled for, and as such sought out new lands to travel to as a way of escaping from what they deemed, "The Curse."

One such individual was currently reminiscing on the day when he decided that he would escape The Curse and travel to new worlds. Not new countries or even continents, mind you. _Worlds._ As in, separate dimensions entirely. Not the most well thought-out idea ever, but then again, people who grew up on Destiny Islands were known for not making very bright decisions.

But, back to the reminiscing individual. This person was probably in his seventies somewhere, had dark skin and a grey beard, and was wearing a black, hooded cloak. To anyone watching, it would look like he was talking to himself. Either that, or he was talking with a giant, rolled-up carpet, which he was holding in his arm.

"Ah, I remember this place," he commented, "This is where I lived until I was eighteen years old. Or maybe I was twenty-two. Or twenty-five. I don't know, I was too busy plotting convoluted schemes to pay much attention to my age."

He got silence in response. "... But really, though. This place was, and probably still _is_ , a nightmare-ish hazard just waiting to happen. Great place to drop you off, huh? Plenty of idiots to follow around, and whatnot." then, he paused. Looking at the blanket he was holding, he said, "Hey, you're not reacting much. Something wrong? I mean, I know you passed out, like, half an hour ago, but..."

Still no response from the blanket. But the figure wrapped up _in_ the blanket did finally start to wake up a little. However, this couldn't be seen because of the blanket. "Huh. I guess he's dead." came the unconcerned statement from the individual. At this, the figure in the blanket spoke up.

"I'm not dead..." was all that he had to say.

"I guess I'll have no choice but to leave him here, then." he continued as if the blanketed figure had never even spoke.

"Don't do that, it's cold out here...!" the blanketed figure complained. Still oblivious to the fact that the figure he was carrying was very much _not_ dead, the older individual placed him on the incredibly slanted trunk of a palm tree. Still, the blanketed figure complained about the sleeping arrangement. "Oh, come on! Couldn't you have at _least_ put me on the sand? The sand is so much softer than this tree trunk thing!"

"Oh, be quiet, it's not like it matters! I mean, you're dead, _what difference does it make?!_ " the older figure retorted. This just lead to the blanketed figure to be confused.

"Wait... you acknowledge that I'm speaking, but you still think I'm dead? What's _wrong_ with you? I'm not dead!" the blanketed figure declared, still feeling befuddled. Only now did it occur to the older individual that maybe he should check if the one in the blanket was really dead or not. Something that really shouldn't have been necessary, given the fact that the one in the blanket was _talking to him_. But then again, this person _did_ spend about twenty years of his life on Destiny Islands, which was bound to make anyone just a little crazy.

"Hmm, maybe I should check to make sure that he's really dead." the old individual said to no one in particular. He approached the figure in the blanket and checked his pulse. The pulse was definitley there, although once again, this wasn't surprising because the blanketed figure was awake and talking a long time _before_ the older one checked his pulse.

"See? Life signs! Now will you stop-" the one in the blanket began, but was very suddenly interrupted by the older individual.

"Huh, I guess he really _is_ dead." came the reaction from the older individual. The blanketed one's eye twitched in irritation, but since he was facing the ground, no one could see that.

"You even bothered to check my pulse and you _still_ think I'm dead?! What is your _problem?!_ " the blanketed one replied, shocked by the older individual's idiocy. The individual in question continued ignoring him and began talking once again.

"I guess I'll have to leave him here, after all." he said.

"Oh, for the love of-! I'm _not dead!_ " he shouted.

"Yup, he's _definitley_ dead."

"ARGH!" the blanketed figure cried out in frustration, "You know what?! I'm just going to sleep! I've _had it_ with this!" And thus, the blanketed figure, quite promptly, went to sleep.

* * *

What the blanketed figure experienced next was what one would assume was a dream. However, it was more than that. This was what was known as a "Dive to the Heart." Few people ever bothered to experience this, but it did happen. However, even fewer people knew what a "Dive to the Heart" was, and this person was definitley one of them.

The next thing he knew, he was falling through a pit of water. This by all means didn't follow the standard laws of physics, because he had only just started falling, so he really shouldn't have been falling as fast as he was.

Plus, the water was cold. Really cold.

His eyes snapped open almost immediatly. "WHAAAGH!" he cried, "Jeez, this water is friggin' _cold!_ And has way too much gravity! SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULENCE-hey, cool! I can breath underwater!" he exclaimed, now preoccupied with the fact that he could talk and breath underwater.

Only, then the blanket he was wearing dissolved.

Yeah. _Dissolved._ Like it was some kind of grain of sugar or something. And it dissolved into _sparkles,_ no less. This finally revealed his face, however. He had blond, spikey hair that sort of swirled upwards in the front. He also had round, blue eyes that were currently wide open in amazement.

"Ooooh, pretty...!" he admired, only to be met with more cold. Shivering, he started complaining about his current predicament. "Okay, where the heck am I, and why is this water so cold?! Maybe it has something to do with the fact that this place looks like an abyss. Actually, come to think of it, WHY AM I IN AN ABYSS?!" he shouted, hoping someone would answer his complaints, even though he knew there was no one in sight.

He finally landed on a giant, glowing white platform. Really hard. He didn't break any bones or anything, but still, it hurt. Getting back on his feet, and complaining quietly to himself about the pain he was in, he started looking around. The platform wasn't completely round, but it looked like it was supposed to be. It had a huge chunk of it that looked like it had broken off, but where the remains were, he wasn't sure. His attention then switched to the fact that he was still freezing.

Then he noticed that, for whatever reason, he wasn't wearing a shirt. Don't be alarmed, he was still wearing pants, but still, it was annoying, not even having his blanket with him.

Then, he heard a voice sound in his head.

'GAH! Where am I?!' the voice shouted. The voice sounded like a really young boy's voice. The blonde figure jerked in surprise.

"Wh-who's there?! And why are you speaking in my head?!" he demanded.

'I... I don't know!' he replied, sounding like he was seriously panicking. 'Where is this place?! Do _you_ know where we are? And... hey, I think I can see you!' the blonde figure started looking around, trying to find the source of the telepathic voice. All he found was a glowing orb of light, something he became extremely fascinated in.

"Hey, look!" he exclaimed, "There's a glowing orb of light over there! ISN'T IT PRETTY?!"

'A glowing orb of light? WHERE?!' the voice said, sounding as excited as the blond person. He pointed towards the orb of light he was referring to. 'Um, why are you pointing at me? I'm not a glowing orb of... OH MY GOD, I'M A GLOWING ORB OF LIGHT! _AWESOME!_ ' the voice shouted, now feeling extremely epic as he realized that he was a glowing orb of light.

"Wait, _you're_ the orb of light? WOW! You're really pretty, Sparkle!" he replied.

'Awwww, thanks! You're so sweet! You're my friend, now!' the voice exclaimed. 'But, um... 'Sparkle'?'

"Oh, sorry! I can give you a different name if you'd like!" the blonde exclaimed, not wanting to hurt the orb of light's feelings.

'Speaking of names, what's yours?' the voice asked.

"Hm? Oh, right! I'm Ventus. It means 'wind' in Latin!" he explained. The orb of light approached him until it was floating in front of his face.

'Oooh, cool! Do I get a name that means 'wind', too?' he asked. Ventus thought about this for a few moments.

"Um, I don't know any other names that mean 'wind'. Actually, I don't know most things, for that matter. I just know a bunch of random trivia for some reason. I could give you one that means 'sky' or something, though. How about... 'Sora'? It means 'sky' in Japanese." he asked. The orb of light would have smiled if he had a mouth.

'I LOVE IT!' Sora shouted, and started flying around in joy. Then he stopped. 'Actually, why am I here, anyways? I mean, isn't this, like, your heart or something?'

"Wait, _what?!_ What do you mean, this is my heart?!" he demanded.

'Um... I don't know! I don't know how I know anything! I'M SO CLUELESS!' Sora shouted, suddenly crying hysterically. Ventus then became more preoccupied with the fact that the giant, glowing platform was supposed to be his heart.

"Okay, so, if this is my heart, or soul, or whatever, then that means..." he paused to consider this. "...Then that means my soul is broken! WAAAGHH!" then he started panicking, bursting into tears the same way Sora had. "What do I do?! A huge chunk of my soul wandered off somewhere, and I don't know how to find it! NOW WHAT?!" he exclaimed.

Sora very suddenly stopped crying when he realized that Ventus was upset.

'H-hey, don't be upset! I-I can try to cheer you up, if you'd like!' he said, trying to think of a way to make Ventus feel better. 'A-Alright, that's it! I'm gonna fuse my soul with yours until you get the rest of your soul back!' he decided. Ventus looked up at Sora with giant, glittery eyes that would make fangirls squeel.

"Y-You'd do that for me? But we've barely known each other for five minutes!" Ventus exclaimed.

'Pssh, like that matters. You're my friend, and friends do ANYTHING for each other.' he explained, beginning to sound to Ventus like he was just a bit obssesive.

"Um, I'm fine, but thanks..." he said cautiously, still not sure what to make of Sora.

'NO. We're fusing souls, right here, right now. Because YOU... are my FRIEND!' he declared, and promptly went over to the broken half of the platform.

"Uh, do you even know how to _do_ that?" Ventus asked, concerned that this soul-fusing would go terribly wrong.

'Nope! For all I know, it's not even possible! But I'm giving it a try, anyway!' Sora exclaimed.

"I really don't think we should try this...!" Ventus protested, but to no avail. There was a flash of light, and suddenly, the glowing white platform was a perfect circle again! Also, Sora was nowhere to be seen. "Oh, my God, it's A PERFECT CIRCLE! It's so pretty, and shiny, and-"

'Now, our hearts have touched.' came Sora's voice once again.

"Uh, that sounds _really_ creepy." Ventus replied, suddenly feeling disturbed.

'Well, what _else_ am I supposed to say? For crying out loud, Vennie, you can't expect too much from me! I've only just been born, for Pete's sake!' he exclaimed. There was a pause.

"Wait, you've only just been born, and the first thing you decide to do is fuse with someone you've only just met? What is your _problem?_ " he demanded. "Also, 'Vennie'?!"

'Yeah. It's a nickname. I figure, since we're so close now and all-'

"Okay, now you're _really_ scaring me!" Ventus interrupted, starting to feel more and more creeped out.

'What? I mean, our _souls_ have _fused_ , for crying out loud! We're, like, the best buddies _ever!_ '

"No, that was just you being weird."

'Waaah, Vennie's dissing on me again~!'

"Okay, you be quiet! Just, shut up. Right now." Ventus demanded, quickly becoming fed up with Sora's behavior.

Awww, okay...

Finally able to think without Sora talking constantly, Ventus began thinking as hard as he could about how to get out of the really cold, watery abyss he was in. Something that proved to be very difficult for him to do, since his mind kept wandering from one thing to another. Eventually, he just became frustrated, what with the cold and not being able to focus on anything. So instead, he gave in and sat down on the platform, allowing his mind to wander as much as it pleased.

Then, the white glow of the platform erupted into petals.

Ventus let out a yelp of surprise, and Sora let out an incredibly long screech of terror, overreacting just a little. In the place of the white glow was a really detailed portrait of Ventus surrounded by various green designs. Ventus took the time to admire the picture of himself before asking Sora for advice. Not the brightest idea, but he was quickly running out of options.

"Hey, Sora... any idea on how I'm supposed to get out of here? I wouldn't normally ask you, but..." he trailed off.

'Aw, thanks for asking! Well, I sort of have an idea. All we have to do is...'

"Open the door, right?" he guessed, assuming that Sora would go with an answer like that.

'Actually, I was going to say that we have to eat chicken sandwiches, but yeah, that works, too.' he replied. Ventus facepalmed at Sora's incompetence.

"How do you even know what a chicken sandwich _is?!_ " he demanded, "I thought you had just been born!"

'Well, because _you_ know what a chicken sandwich is. And I've fused with your heart, so obviously, I know some of the things you know! Isn't that AWESOME?!' he exclaimed.

"Uh... sure..." he replied, once again feeling creeped out by the fact that Sora had not only fused with his soul, but in some ways, his mind, too.

'But, anyways, you can probably get out if you just wake up.'

"Wait, you mean, this is a dream?" he asked.

No, but you _are_ asleep.

"That's... confusing, but okay. How do I wake up?"

'Maybe if you hit yourself _really hard_ -'

" _No._ "

'Okay, then I've got nothing. How do you _usually_ wake up?' Sora asked.

"Well, I... I don't know." he stated, suddenly aware of the fact that he couldn't remember how he did anything.

'You mean, you don't remember?' he asked.

"Actually, come to think of it, I don't really remember anything before waking up a little while ago to some old guy accusing me of being dead." he explained.

'Oh. _Are_ you dead?'

" _No_ , of course not! Why does everyone think that?!" he exclaimed.

'I dunno! Hey, since I've fused with your soul, does mean I can like, posses you or something?' Sora suddenly asked. This _really_ made Ventus panic.

"I have no idea, but DON'T YOU EVEN TRY IT! I'll have more than enough of your shenanigans without you _possesing me_ on top of it.!" he said firmly.

'Hey, I wonder what _this_ does?' Sora wondered.

"Don't talk about my heart like it's some kind of spaceship-! WHOA!" Ventus exclaimed, as a sudden flash of light erupted in front of him.

The next thing he knew, he was awake, back on Destiny Islands where he was before. He turned over on the tree trunk he was on, and suddenly, a Keyblade was summoned in his hand. "DANG IT, SORA, WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT POSSESING ME?!" Ventus demanded.

'I swear, I wasn't trying to!' Sora protested.

"Yeah, well, if you don't fix it _right now_ I'll have to force you out of my soul! The _hard_ way!" he threatened.

'Okay, okay! Just let me try and fix it! Um... hang on, maybe if I do this-'

Suddenly, a bright line of light came from the Keyblade he was holding and shot into the sky.

" _Sora...!_ "

' _I didn't touch anything!_ ' he protested.

"Quit talking about my soul like it's a spaceship!" he yelled.

"A KEYBLADE!" the old man's voice sounded. Apparently, he hadn't moved too far from where Ventus was laying. Ventus was about to start getting on Sora's case again when he saw the sparkles dancing before his eyes, caused by the light from the keyblade.

"Oh, my God... it's... it's... so PRETTY...!" he said, staring unblinkingly at the sparkles. Then the old man started speaking again.

"Hmm, I guess he's not dead after all!" he commented.

"No DUH!" Ventus retorted, still not over the fact that the old man had been so convinced of him being dead earlier.

"I think I'll take you to my buddy, Eraqus." he continued, "That oughta do something productive."

"Wait, who?"

'Hey, Vennie?' Sora inquired.

"Ven _tus_." he corrected.

'Sure, whatever. Listen, I kind of have to go back to where my body is, so I'll have to leave.'

"Oh, thank God! I-I mean... okay, sure." he responded. And with that, he got back full control over his body, and the Keyblade disappeared.

He sighed. He had no idea what was going to happen next, but he could only hope it wasn't going to be influenced by the old man or Sora too much.

* * *

 **Author's Notes** **:** Oh, Xehanort. How he manages to come up with convoluted plots at all is beyond anyone's understanding. Also, those of you who've read Parody Mix will notice that Sora really hasn't changed at all since he was a newborn heart. This is how we know he's mature. XD

And poor Ven! He was to put up with both of their incompetence, what with Xehanort convinced he's dead and Sora trying to use his soul like it's a spaceship! I always wondered why he randomly summoned a Keyblade and shot a light towards the sky at the beginning. Anyhow, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter despite it's length!


	2. The Would-Be Concering Meteor Shower

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Square Enix, Disney, or any of their products, including characters, names of places, etc. All rights go to their respective owners.  
**

* * *

It was dark out. No one knew exactly what time it was, since clocks hadn't properly been invented yet. After all, this _was_ the era that thought coming up with your own logic was far superior to following any standards of common sense, such as they were.

Currently, a certain spikey blonde-haired individual was trying in vain to sleep properly, experiencing a dream unlike most others.

Ventus very suddenly awoke after the dream he had just been having with a feeling of dissatisfaction. He remembered the dream very clearly: he had been presumably kidnapped by his teacher's friend, left on an island, and then had his soul fused with a newborn soul with some serious issues. He sat up, thinking about the dream with great intensity.

 _That sure was a vivid dream,_ he thought, _it was like it was something that had already happened. But I don't remember it ever happening… unless I just did one of those things where I—_

He very suddenly stopped that train of thought when he saw what he was wearing. Feeling extremely discontent with himself, he switched his focus on this newfound issue. Which was: he was still wearing his regular clothes.

"Aw, _seriously?!_ I went to sleep wearing my shoes _again!_ " he complained. " _And_ my armor! Jeez, there's no wonder I had such a weird dream! You know, I really gotta stop doing this. I get so distracted with the concept of sleep that I forget to put on my pajamas! Which is a real shame, since they're so _cozy._ But hey, what's done is done, right? And besides," he added, "It's not too late to go switch right now. Then I can go back to sleep." Satisfied with this idea, and still recuperating from the dream, he continued with this train of thought before he could forget. "Yeah, yeah! And then I won't have to worry about any more creepy soul-bondings after that! And I'll get to be all warm and cozy until Terra wakes me up with a battle cry again. Then he'll probably be freaking out about something, and—hey, what was that?" he said, turning his attention to the large window that was right beside his bed. He had just seen, or thought he saw, a small light zip by.

He was right: he had just seen a shooting star. After seeing a few more of them, he realized something that took over any other priorities he might have had: there was a meteor shower occurring right before his eyes.

Letting out a shout of excitement, he jumped off his bed with newfound energy and rushed down the miniature castle he was in.

For the first time since he woke up, he was completely focused on this singular task. He was going to march down there, and watch the meteor shower until it finished, no matter how long he had to stay up to do so.

He was filled with motivation. He was completely intent on succeeding in his mission. Because at that point, that's what it was: a mission. His goal. It was his _destiny_. It was the will of Hitsuzen that he go down those stairs, and across those fields, jumping over those small bodies of water, until he reached the perfect spot to witness the one, the only, the true epic epicness that was—

"Hey, look! Training pendulum things!"

Well, maybe he wasn't quite as focused as he thought.

He rushed over to the nearest pendulum-like training ring and summoned his Keyblade. Unlike all of the other Keyblade wielders he knew, Ventus wielded his Keyblade with a reverse grip, something that made him feel very special. He ferociously unleashed a three-hit combo on the first pendulum-ring before moving on to the next one, which had four rings hanging from it. Ventus smirked. "Heh. I bet you want a taste of this, too, huh?" he mocked, not caring about the fact that he was, in fact, speaking to an inanimate object.

He started attacking the second set of pendulum-rings in a similar fashion, although this soon proved more difficult once the rings started spinning and whacking him on the head. "Owww! Dude, that _hurt!_ " he complained. It was then that he used one of the most impressive, athletic, skilled maneuvers to ever be used during a fight against pendulums.

He sidestepped.

That was it, really.

He landed a few more hits on the pendulum-rings and was going to continue attacking them, when he heard a signature 'FWASH' sound, signaling the abrupt, inexplicable spawning of a treasure chest nearby. Immediately his face lit up at the thought of treasure, and began searching frantically for it. Eventually, he found it on top of a small cliff. He tapped it with the Keyblade, allowing it to open. From it, a small, spinning ball of light arose. Ventus waited until it was above his head to place his hands around it, letting out a short tune of victory. "DA NA NA NAAAAAAA!" he exclaimed, feeling extremely content with himself, even though he had no idea what had just picked up.

Seeing another shooting star pass by overhead was enough to remind him of the reason he came out there in the first place. "THAT'S RIGHT!" he yelled, "I need to get to that meteor shower!"

And thus, he went on a long and tedious journey to find the perfect place to watch the stars from. He had to run about, what, twenty feet? That's a long distance. Don't try to pretend that it isn't.

Upon reaching the cliff, he laid down on the grass and watched the stars fly by, one after the other. He very frequently expressed how beautiful he thought they were once five or six had gone by. Eventually, as the shower began to end, he started to fall asleep, until the realm of dreams encompassed him.

This didn't last for very long, however, as he was soon woken up very suddenly by someone slapping him. Really hard.

He jolted upward, his mind feeling hazy and sleep-deprived. "Terra...?!" he wondered aloud, feeling that only Terra would bother to slap him in order to wake him up.

"N-No, it's me." Came the feminine, familiar voice of the one who slapped him. Ventus turned around. Standing over him was a girl that was a few years older than him, had shoulder-length blue hair and wore a collared shirt, shorts, and sash around her waist that looked both really cool and really impractical at the same time. It was one of his best friends, Aqua.

"What the heck, Aqua?! Why'd you hit me?!" he demanded, not used to such blatant acts of violence from his friend before he had done anything. Aqua herself had an expression of shock on her face.

"I… I don't know. I just suddenly had this feeling like I should reference a moment that hasn't even happened yet." She explained, sounding as confused as Ventus felt. Ventus sighed. Aqua was always doing stuff like that. It was as if she just had some inner sense of the future or something. It compelled her to do some strange things sometimes.

"Well, okay. Whatever you say, Aqua." He said, trying his best to shrug it off. The two of them went to the edge of the cliff and sat down, looking at the stars. A few moments passed, which was enough time for Ventus to come up with a new topic. "Hey, do you ever wonder what stars are? Where that light comes from? I think we learned about it in class a few times, but I kept getting distracted." Aqua gave him a look of exasperation.

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me. Well, allow me to give you a quick review. Stars are-"

"Stars are the most brilliant invention of mankind, Ventus!" a new voice interrupted. Both Ventus and Aqua jerked in surprise and turned around. Sanding behind them was none other than Terra, who had shoulder-length brown hair, wore a grey shirt with red X-shaped straps and tan-colored pants that poofed out a ton, although in a different manor than Ventus's.

"Terra? What are _you_ doing here?" Aqua asked, still calming down from the initial shock of Terra appearing out of nowhere. Both Terra and Ventus ignored Aqua's question.

"Invention of… mankind…?" Ventus repeated, feeling confused. Terra came over to them, wrapping his arm around Ventus's shoulders.

"That's right, Ven!" he exclaimed, pointing upward at the stars. "Each of those stars up there represent a different dimension entirely, and the light is the pride of a thousand honorable warriors' hearts, shining down on us like a million lanterns!"

Aqua gave Terra a dumbstruck look. Ven, on the other hand, just looked confused and fascinated with this new piece of information.

"I… don't think I get it." He said, raising an eyebrow. Terra stopped pointing at the sky.

"To put it simply, they're just like you and me, Ven!" he explained. This did nothing to help Ven understand anything. Aqua continued staring at the two in disbelief.

"Uh, what does THAT mean?" he asked, removing Terra's arm from his shoulders. Terra gave him an extremely sunshiny smile.

"Oh, I'm sure you'll figure it out someday!" he said happily. This did nothing but anger Ven, who stood up and gave him a glare.

"I don't want to figure it out _some_ day, I wanna know _now!_ " he demanded, getting fed up with the way Terra taught things. Terra gave him a serious look.

"Well, you're too _young_ to know right now." He said firmly. Ven was starting to reach his limit of self-control at this point.

" _How?!_ How am I too "young"?! This is _very_ basic material!" he shouted. Aqua, who had been staring dumbfounded this whole time, finally decided to speak up.

"Regardless of how old you have to be to know what stars are, I'm still stuck at 'the most brilliant invention of mankind.'" She said. Terra turned his attention to Aqua and nodded in a sort of 'knowing' sense.

"Ah, yes. 'Tis the hearts of mankind that creates all those other worlds out there," he explained, then suddenly clenched his fist in a very enthusiastic fashion. "The hearts filled with firey passion! The hearts destined to become all that they can be! THE HEARTS THAT WILL TRIUMPH OVER ALL AND UNLEASH THE ONE, TRUE HEART TO ALL WORLDS: _KINGDOM HEARTS!_ "

Ven and Aqua just stared.

"Uh… okay…?" was all Aqua could say. After a few moments of confusion on Ven's part, his eyes lit up.

"Wow…! I didn't know that!" he said, causing Aqua to facepalm in irritation.

" _Anyways…_ " she began, trying her best to change the topic, "I got something for us." This immediately caught Ventus's attention.

"Ooooh, really? What?" he asked, filled with intrigue. Terra, however, was still reminiscing on the stars being filled with a firey passion.

Aqua then held up three matching, star-shaped trinkets in different colors; one was blue, one was green, and the other was orange. She smiled.

"I made us all good luck charms!" she announced. She tossed the green one at Ven, who caught in in an amazing display of reflexes. She then threw the orange one at Terra, who didn't see it coming in the slightest, and as such got hit on the head with it.

" _Ow!_ What _was_ that?" he wondered aloud, finally turning around and picking the trinket off the ground. He stared at the charm with great intensity. "…What is this? Some kind of necklace?" he asked, trying really hard to figure out what the purpose for a good luck charm was. Ven was staring as his trinket, too, only for a completely different reason. His eyes were wide with excitement and admiration.

"…I get one, too?" he asked, feeling very special at the moment. He lifted it up and started spinning around, away from the ledge as to not fall off. "YAAAAAAYYY! I get to have a cute little star thing! And would you look at that! It comes in my favorite color!" he exclaimed, acting somewhat immature for his age.

Terra was still fiddling with his, trying to see if there was some special ability attached to it.

"…So, what does it _do_ , exactly?" he asked, not taking his eyes away from it. Aqua, finally given an opportunity to explain things for once, smiled as she began explaining the history behind them.

"Well, you see, Terra, one of those worlds out there has trees that bear star-shaped fruit," she explained, "and if you and your friends where good luck charms shaped like them, then you'll always come back to each other safely!" she paused. A realization dawned on her. "Oh… crap."

"What is it?" Ven asked.

"I… think you're actually supposed to make them out of seashells. These are made from stained glass." She said, feeling like she had seriously just messed up. Terra finally looked at Aqua and away from his pendant. He was about to say something when Ven spoke first.

"So… does that mean it's not actually a good luck charm?" he asked, suddenly feeling a lot less enthusiastic. Aqua considered this for a few moments.

"Actually, they might be some kind of magical soul-link." She said, recalling how she experimented her magic on them earlier.

Ventus froze.

Terra just looked confused.

"So, basically, I have to wear a flawed, magical piece of jewelry as a soul-link between you and Ven?" he asked, giving her a look of disbelief. "I… don't think I'm comfortable with that."

"Oh? And why not?" Aqua replied.

"Well, first of all, this trinket looks very… feminine." He began. A spark of anger rose within Aqua.

"What's _wrong_ with things that are feminine?" she demanded.

"It's not necessarily that it's wrong, it's just… not me." He explained, trying his best not to upset her too much. "Plus, the thought of sharing souls with a girl and a kid is just so much _no!_ "

"It's supposed to be symbolic! Why do you think they're called 'Wayfinders'?"

"It's not symbolic if it's literal!"

"Literal…?" came the shaky response from Ven, who had been frozen in place the whole time. "A _literal_ soul-link…? As in, our souls are fusing because we're holding these trinkets…?" he started shaking with the memory of fusing his heart with a newborn Sora.

Seeing the state of fright he was in, Aqua started trying desperately to calm him down.

"What?! No, no, it's not like that! I mean that in times of need, we can lend each other some of our magical power even if we're dimensions away! It's not nearly as creepy as you two are trying to make it out to be!" she explained quickly. Ventus let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh, thank God! Okay, I feel better now." He said, assuring everyone he was alright. Terra was happy, too. He nodded his head in approval.

"Extra strength given from one's comrades when a fight gets tough? I like it! Such is the result of your passion, Aqua!" he exclaimed. Aqua smiled.

"Aw, thanks, Terra—"

"Alright! From this day forward," he interrupted as he lifted the trinket above his head, "I will carry with me this Wayfinder made from Aqua's inner flame, this incredibly feminine yet very well-painted star made out of stained glass, this one true link to my friends' inner magical power! I will carry it to the ends of the Earth if I must, because this right here is a work of art, and art lights the fires within! I will—!"

"Okay, that's enough, Terra." Aqua interrupted, happy that Terra had respect for her inventions but annoyed at how long he was carrying on about it. Ven laughed.

"Ha-ha, yeah, Terra sure does like talking, doesn't he? But you know, as long as our souls aren't fusing, I'll be glad to carry it around all the time, too!" he said happily. Terra gave him a slightly disapproving look but didn't say anything about it. Instead, he turned his attention to Aqua and said,

"By the way, don't you and I have our Mark of Mastery Exam tomorrow?" That got Aqua panicking. She jolted upwards, that realization finally hitting her full force.

"OH, CRAP!" she exclaimed.

"Such language, Aqua." Ventus teased.

"Shut up, Ven, this fanfiction is rated K+, no one's going to care! And it's not a curse word!"

"I was just teasing…"

"In any case," Terra said, "I think if we're going to take a test to prove ourselves to be true warriors, then we'd best spar against each other like true warriors!" he declared.

"For one of the first times in my life, I agree with you, Terra. Which of us is fighting who first?" she asked. Ven started jumping up and down, waving his hand up in the air.

"Oh! Oh! I wanna fight Terra!" he exclaimed. Terra agreed wholeheartedly with Ven, and the three went to a clearing to start sparring.

Ven attacked first. One would assume that Ventus had an advantage over Terra, seeing as he was much quicker, smaller, and therefor harder to hit. But Terra had something going for him aside from his much more powerful attacks: he had the Information Bar on his side.

That's right. The Information Bar.

Now, many of you are probably wondering: what exactly is the Information Bar and how does Terra have access to it? Well, the answer is simple. Sort of.

The Information Bar, while not a physical entity of any sort and therefor wasn't really a "bar" at all, was essentially guidance lines that suddenly popped into Terra's head. He didn't think of it as a person since it wasn't necessarily telepathy in the traditional sense, but he knew it wasn't himself who was thinking up all the random information being given to him.

Sometimes, he liked to think of it as his inner soul giving him advice, but he never thought too much about it and generally obeyed whatever the Information Bar told him to.

How he has access to the Information Bar at all is a mystery to everyone.

Currently, the Information Bar was telling him to simply block Ventus's attacks. As usual, he did just that, although not before landing a few attacks on Ven himself.

Ventus, getting annoyed that Terra was just blocking and not doing much else, decided to get on his case about it. "Hey, Terra! Don't go easy on me, you hear? If you're going to try and win, then you need to go more on the offensive!" he shouted.

"B-But… the Information Box told me to!" he protested. Ven rolled his eyes.

"Again with that? Did you ever once think to _ignore_ the Information Box?" he asked. Terra froze in place.

"You know… I never even considered it." He replied, pondering this new concept. He didn't have much time to think about it, however, since Ven started attacking again.

After a long, drawn-out battle, Terra finally managed to beat Ven, who complained about losing but didn't ask for a rematch. Aqua approached them.

"Well, Terra, that technique works well enough if you're fighting one-on-one. But you forgot all about the _other_ technique that works fighting one-on-one _and_ in a crowd." She said. Terra and Ven both looked at her with a confused expression.

"You mean, Auto-Reticle?" Ven asked.

"I think she's talking about Z-Targeting." Terra suggested.

"Argh, no! I'm talking about Shotlock! You know, that really cool, charge attack that you use a green reticle for?!" she explained, frustrated that neither of her friends knew what she was talking about. "Come on, you guys! We've been learning this stuff for years! How is it that you don't know?!"

"Don't blame me!" Ventus protested, "It's not _my_ fault we have to act ignorant for the sake of the tutorial!"

"For the sake of what now?" Terra asked.

"Ignore him. Here, let me show you all what I mean." And thus, Aqua targeted Ven with the Shotlock technique, waiting for it to charge all the way, and then unleashed the most terrifying, unimaginable horror to ever come from a charged attack in the history of video gaming.

She sent… floating bubbles after him.

That's right, bubbles. Oh, the horror.

"Oh, no! Not the Bubble Attack! I can't stand the Bubble Attack! NOOOOOOOOOO!" Ven screamed, leaving everyone to wonder if he was actually scared of the bubbles or if he was just pretending. Nevertheless, both Aqua and Terra facepalmed at his reaction.

"Alright, guys! It's time we finally wrapped this up!" Terra exclaimed, deciding to ignore Ventus for the moment.

"Why?" Aqua asked. "It can't possibly be _that_ late."

"Don't you understand, Aqua?!" Terra shouted, shaking Aqua around by the shoulders. "If we don't finish this with an epic free-for-all, then all of this will have been worthless!" letting go of Aqua, he suddenly let out a yawn. "Plus, I'm getting tired."

Ven considered this for a moment.

"Actually, speaking of which, I went to sleep last night with my armor and stuff on. But that was 'cause I got distracted by sleep. So why are _you_ two still wearing your regular clothes? I thought I was the only one who did stupid stuff like that." He said. There was a few moments of silence. No one seemed to have an answer to that.

"..Um, that aside," Aqua said, finally breaking the silence, "let's just do as Terra suggests and have a free-for-all."

"Wait, _you're_ taking suggestions from Terra?" Ven asked, dumbstruck. "What is the world coming to?"

"Ven?" she inquired.

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

"Fine."

And with that, they all had a wild free-for-all. It was hazardous, to put it lightly. Terra kept smashing up the surrounding area in an attempt to hit his quicker, more agile opponents. There were bubbles _everywhere_ , courtesy of Aqua's Shotlock, and things got blown around even more than before because Ven kept spamming his Wind spell. By the end of it, it looked as though a hurricane had hit the place, and all the water on the ground (from the bubbles) hinted at a possible flood.

They were all also extremely tired. Not only was it nearing one in the morning, but all the fighting had worn them out.

What was truly phenomenal was that their Wayfinders were in perfect condition despite the ferocious battle that had taken place.

"Jeez, Aqua, what are these thing _made_ out of?!" Ven exclaimed, staring at his Wayfinder in disbelief. "I got hit with more of those bubbles and rocks than I can count, and yet _this thing_ doesn't have a scratch!"

"I already told you, they're made out of stained glass!" she replied. Terra was also staring at his Wayfinder with an absurd amount of pride.

"This is WONDERFUL!" he shouted, "I had no idea anyone was capable of crafting such excellence, such invincibility, such-!"

"We get it, Terra!" Aqua interrupted. "Now how about we all go back to sleep? We have to get up early for that Exam tomorrow!"

"You're absolutely right, Aqua! I will go to sleep with the utmost ferocity, to prove that I am, in fact, worthy of the Mark of—" he was interrupted once again, this time by a sudden light appearing on the ground in front of them, marked by two smaller, rotating lights. Ven's face lit up.

"Oh, that's right! We don't want to lose our progress! Hang on, I'll go save real quick!" he said.

For those of you wondering what he meant by "saving", Ventus was referring to the lights. For whatever reason, Ven always considered these inexplicable lights as "Save Points", which he deemed kept track of all their progress. No one knew how he came up with that or why he was so insistent on "saving" as frequently as he did. Like Terra's Information Bar, his friends had learned to accept it and not question it too much. "Okay, done! Now let's go back." He said. And with that, the three of them went back to their respective rooms in order to get enough rest for the next day. Because on that day was: The Mark of Mastery Exam.

* * *

 **Authors Notes:** Chapter 2 is finally done! We get to meet Terra and Aqua, and we are introduced to massive fourth-wall breaking. Also, kudos to anyone who gets all the references in this chapter!


	3. The Increadibly Drawn-Out Mark of Master

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Kingdom Hearts. Kingdom Hearts is owned by Disney and Square Enix, so all characters, places, and plot points belong to them.**

 **Hello, everyone! Finally, at long last, a new chapter! I had to rewrite this whole thing from scratch, which, while frustrating, hopefully led to a better chapter than what it was originally.**

 **Here's your nice, long chapter in return for your nice, long wait!**

* * *

Ven, for once in his life, was at complete peace with the universe. He had somehow managed to remember to put on his pajamas when he went back to sleep the night before, it wasn't too hot nor too cold, and he was having one of the best dreams he'd ever had. In the dream, he was riding on the rainbows of space that flew through the skies with the Wings of Tomorrow, flying towards the heart of all worlds: Kingdom Cupcake.

Unfortunately, his peace was short-lived, for he was abruptly awoken by Terra's all-too-familiar battle cry.

"AAAAAAAAGGGHHHUUOOOOAAAOOOORAAAAAAGGHHHH!" he shrieked. Ventus woke up with a jolt, groaning in disdain and exasperation. He could faintly hear Terra yell something about a storm calling for their greatness and Aqua yell something in response.

Suddenly, the door to his bedroom burst open, revealing Terra, who was wearing his regular shirt and pajama pants. His trademark pants were wrapped around his neck like a scarf, one of the legs draped over his messy hair. "VENTUS!" he yelled as he opened the door. He quickly leaped onto Ven's bed, shaking him around by the shoulders to wake him up. "WAKE UP, VENTUS! YOU MUST AWAKEN BEFORE THE CEREMONY BEGINS! _HUZZAH!_ " he added, jumping back onto the ground.

"...Yeah, uh, o-okay…" Ven replied groggily, his head spinning from being shaken around so much so early in the morning. "Can you leave now?" As soon as he finished his sentence, he heard Aqua let out a cry of frustration, which sounded alarmingly similar to Terra's previous war-cry.

"TEEERRRRAAAAAA!" she yelled, her voice coming closer by the second. A look of panic spread across Terra's face, as though a monster was hunting him down. He quickly grabbed Ven, who was sitting and trying to remove the 'sleep scales' from his eyes, and dragged him into a nearby closet. Unfortunately, in his rush to get them in the closet, they both soon became tangled in Ven's clothes that were hanging up.

Ven's face was also promptly squished against the wall of his closet, feeling that he was too tired to have to put up with this, but accepting the fact that life just hated him sometimes.

It was at that moment when Aqua burst into the room, wearing a blue nightgown and brandishing her Keyblade, her hair just as messed up as Terra's and Ven's. And accompanying all this was a glare that could kill if given the opportunity.

"WHAT IS _WRONG_ WITH YOU?!" Aqua yelled, presumably at Terra.

"You're going to have to be a _bit_ more specific." Terra replied stiffly, trying not to make a complete fool of himself in a closet.

" _You know what I'm talking about!_ " she snapped, "How is it that I give my music box to you for _one night_ and you manage to change the song it plays _completely?!_ " Aqua demanded, fury burning in her eyes.

"All I did was make it better for sleeping!" Terra protested, his anger beginning to rise.

"Listening to "A Song of Storm and Fire" at twice its original speed is _not_ good for sleeping!"

"Of course it is! Much better than listening to Ilia's theme at half its original speed!"

"It was _supposed_ to be relaxing!" Aqua yelled.

"What does relaxing have to do with sleep?!" Terra demanded.

"Wha—but— _what?!_ What do you think sleep is _supposed_ to be like?!"

"AN EPIC, HEART—POUNDING JOURNEY TO THE DEPTHS OF THE SOUL!" he exclaimed.

" _WHAT?!"_

"Um, excuse me," Ventus interrupted, "but could you take this argument somewhere else? Preferably, somewhere that _isn't_ my bedroom closet."

Aqua suddenly seemed a bit embarrassed.

"Oh, um, right. Terra, we'd better leave. Mark of Mastery today and all that." She said awkwardly. Terra looked confused.

"But we have not yet resolved our scuffle! What kind of warriors are we if we cannot resolve something as small as this in the morning?" he asked, trying to detach himself from the various clothes he had entangled himself in.

"We can solve it later! During the exam maybe." Aqua offered, earning a smile from Terra.

"Sounds good to me! Come, Ventus! WE SHALL MEET IN THE HALL OF BREAKFAST!" he shouted, finally free from the closet and running out the door.

"Okay, okay, I'm coming," Ventus grumbled. "…Just as soon as I can figure out how to get out of here."

* * *

After a hectic breakfast involving a dissolved bottle cap, a wrench, and a can opener, Ven and Aqua spent the next few hours listening to Terra ramble about various different things. ("And thus the light of day shall guide the wind of the night towards the fires of _victory!_ ") But finally, it was time for the long-awaited Mark of Mastery Exam.

Terra and Aqua were standing up straight and tall before their teacher, Master Eraqus, eagerly awaiting their master's instructions. Ven was standing off to the side, feeling a bit anxious but otherwise bored. There just wasn't anything _fun_ going on yet. Listening to their teacher rant on and on about things that didn't apply to Ven at all was about as fun as watching paint dry on the moon.

"Ah, my young students!" Eraqus began. "Today is truly the most _righteous day of your lives!_ For today you shall prove whether you are truly worthy of the Light! My best friend and bitter rival, Xehanort, has come to watch you as well, so try not to embarrass him, will you?" he added, giving Terra a look.

"Speaking of which, Eraqus," Xehanort started, "what exactly are you going to test them with? Magically produced mountains of death? Horrid monsters beyond all form and description trying to absorb the very fabric of their being? _Evil pancaked syrup?!_ " he eagerly awaited Eraqus's response.

"Even better!" Eraqus exclaimed, grinning brightly. "I'm going to send… GIANT GLOWING ORBS OF LIGHT THAT DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AT THEM!"

There was a brief moment of silence between the two. Terra and Aqua were beginning to make small talk in an attempt to not lose their minds waiting for the test to start.

"…Really? That's it? You are so pathetic, Eraqus." Xehanort commented, wondering how Eraqus became a Master in the first place.

"Well, in all fairness, I doubted Terra was capable enough to handle anything else from the beginning," Eraqus explained. "I mean, he is just a _tiny_ bit of a spaz." Thankfully, Terra was too immersed in his conversation with Aqua to notice just how much his teacher was insulting him.

Out of what seemed to Ven like nowhere, several giant orbs of light were summoned behind Aqua and Terra, quickly snapping them out of their conversation.

Xehanort, however, was extremely displeased with the whole thing, so he decided: _why not sabotage the whole test? That would most CERTAINLY be entertaining!_

And thus, using the most villainous hand gesture possible, he lit the orbs up with darkness! Suddenly, they began to move, and Xehanort was most pleased with himself.

He let out a phenomenally evil chuckle, one that Eraqus was far too used to at this point to deem it suspicious, and the orbs of light started circling around Terra and Aqua.

"Blimey, Aqua!" Terra exclaimed, briefly taking on a subtle English accent, "Can you believe we're finally here?! Now is the time for us to become masters! Now is the time to defeat these measly circles and prove ourselves worthy of the title of "Master"! Do you feel the adrenaline?! The suspense?! It's such an honor to be here at this moment, in which-HOLY CRAP, VEN, LOOK OUT!" he exclaimed suddenly, seeing one of the orbs fly towards Ventus, who was busy spacing out.

A slap from the orb that knocked him to the ground was all he needed to snap his attention back to reality. He gave an epic frown and started stabbing the orb repeatedly with his Keyblade.

"All clear!" he shouted. Aqua didn't buy it for one second, though.

"Ven, it's dangerous here! Now go wait in your room and let us adults handle this!" she commanded.

Something in Ven's mind suddenly snapped.

"Oh, sure, let the _kid_ run from danger! Never mind the fact that the kid in question has been training to fight for over four years, now! WELL SCREW THAT, AQUA, I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!" he shrieked, suddenly tackling several of the orbs, destroying them all with swift blows and repetitive stabbing to prove his point.

Panting, he gave a quick glare at Aqua, who replied with a quick "Point taken."

As Terra, Aqua, and Ventus continued to beat the spheres into oblivion, Xehanort let out an extremely audible laugh, one that was just as evil as his chuckle. Eraqus gave him a look.

"Xe-Xe, why do you keep laughing like that? This is an important moment for the kiddies! Don't distract them by reminding them of our unending rivalry and eternal friendship by laughing like a crazy person!" he scolded.

"DON'T CALL ME XE-XE!" he shouted, "AND I CAN LAUGH HOWEVER AND WHENEVER I WANT! _YOU CAN'T ORDER ME AROUND! YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY REAL BROTHER!_ "

"Does that mean I can be your fake brother, instead?" Eraqus asked hopefully.

"NO!" Xehanort screamed back.

"MASTER!" Terra screamed at an equal volume. There was a slightly crazed look on his face, product of his extended battle. "WE HAVE DEFEATED THE SPHERES OF DOOMY-DOOM! PLEASE GIVE US OUR NEXT INSTRUCTIONS! _SIR!_ "

Eraqus face-palmed.

"Uh, right. As the next part of your RIGHTEOUS test, I want you and Aqua to fight to the death!"

"Excuse me, Master," Aqua interrupted, "but somehow I don't think that's a good idea. If one of us wins, we'll be met with guilt over killing one our frien-teammates. Killing one of our teammates. In front of children. Yeah. Think of the children!"

"What's this I hear about _children?_ " Ven retorted, having paid attention to nothing from that conversation except "think of the children." Eraqus ignored him.

"Oh, fine, then. Just fight until you knock the other out, I guess." he grudgingly replied. _Dang it,_ he thought to himself, _I was hoping to finally kill Terra. Guess I'll have to wait for another opportunity, then._

And thus, Terra and Aqua fought.

"You go, Aqua! Get 'er, Terra! KICK EACH OTHER INTO THE DARK WORLD OF SPOILED CUPCAKES!" Ven cheered, not really caring who won.

Their fight was intense; Terra let out the occasional battle-cry, threw many attacks that Aqua cartwheeled around and threw some blows of her own, but most importantly, they were evenly matched. Most of their blows didn't even hit each other.

Terra was soon becoming frustrated; how was he supposed to prove himself worthy to the vast multi-verse if he couldn't win against his best friend?

Then his left forearm spontaneously burst into dark, swirly flames.

"AAAGGHHHH! AAAHHHHHHHGGGG! GET IT OFF! _GET IT OFF!_ OH, DEAR, SWEET LORD, SOMEONE GET A PILE OF SAND! MAGNESIUM BURN, _MAGNESIUM BURN!_ " he shrieked at the top of his lungs.

While Eraqus was wondering how in the world Terra knew what magnesium was, Ven grabbed a random bucket of sand out of nowhere and dumped it over his arm, Terra letting out screams of horror the whole time.

"Okay... okay, I think I'm better, now..." Terra gasped, trying not to panic more than he needed to.

"No, wait, I'm not done!" Ven replied, "I still need to chant a holy speech in order to complete this task! _Cupcakes, biscuits, chocolate, too, reds are roses..._ "

Terra tried really, _really_ hard not to stare at Ven in disturbed curiosity. It was made slightly easier when Aqua started attacking him again.

"Terra! It's time to end this!" Aqua exclaimed.

"I agree with you entirely, Aqua!" Terra replied enthusiastically.

" _...syrup, ice cream, huge buffet, blues are violets, scream 'hurray!'_ " Ven chanted.

* * *

"We have deliberated and reached a decision." Eraqus announced.

"No, _you_ deliberated, and _I_ ate pancakes." Xehanort corrected.

"Shut up, you."

The battle had finished, and Terra and Aqua were now standing before Eraqus once again, Ven having finished his 'holy chant' and now extremely anxious. Or, he would have been, if his mind wasn't suddenly filled with pancake fantasies as soon as Xehanort had said the word.

Eraqus eventually declared that the fight was over, that he had changed the rules, but really, it was just lasting too long and neither had knocked the other out yet.

"The point is," Eraqus continued, "I have considered your fighting capabilities and overall skill level as well as intelligence, and I have decided that Aqua... HAS BECOME THE NEW KEYBLADE MASTER!" he paused, noticing that Terra was looking at him with big, hopeful puppy eyes. "As for you, Terra, you could not control the darkness inside of you, so you don't _get_ to be a master." He refrained from adding an "In your face!" to avoid making a complete fool of himself. He was, of course, _not_ Terra, so making a fool of himself was not something he did regularly.

Terra looked as though he just died a little inside. In reality, he died _a lot_ inside. Aqua, while not dead, _was_ pretty outraged.

"With all due respect, Master, that has nothing to do with fighting capabilities, overall skill, _or_ intelligence." she declared. "You can tell from our fight just now that we're perfectly matched! Shouldn't we _both_ be masters?"

Terra gave Aqua a look of bewilderment and gratitude. In all the years they'd known each other, Aqua _never_ stood up for him on _any_ occasion. Her newly-found compassion made him blush ever so slightly, but it was gone as soon as Eraqus started talking again.

"Hey, _I'm_ the master, here! I make the decisions!" he retorted.

"Actually, you just made _me_ a master, so technically, I _can_ make Terra a master if I so choose!" she shot back.

" _Actually_ , you can't, because he's not your apprentice and you can't make him as such, because I still hold jurisdiction over him. So there." he snapped, feeling extremely prideful when he saw that Aqua didn't have a response to that. He paused. "I'm leaving now. You're all dismissed."

Aqua gave Terra an apologetic look.

"Sorry, Terra. You tried. But there's always next time-"

" _Hey, guys!_ " Ven exclaimed, running over to them. "I just noticed that Eraqus and his bitter rival just left. I... kinda spaced out about pancakes the whole time. Sorry about that. What'd I miss?"

Aqua was suddenly very angry.

"You idiot! While you were daydreaming about pancakes, Terra here was being told that he doesn't have what it takes to be a Keyblade Master!" she shouted. Ven gave her a defiant look.

"Well, _excuuuse me,_ but thinking about pancakes is a lot more entertaining than-wait, Terra got told WHAT?!" he exclaimed. Terra sighed.

"Friends, as much as I appreciate your outrage, I'm afraid I require... _isolation!_ For the time being." he added. And with that, he left.

* * *

Xehanort walked down a corridor towards a _mysterious figure_ wearing a black, one-piece suit with a half-skirt attached, as well as a helmet that covered his face.

"You were supposed to be here an hour ago." the mysterious figure remarked. "How long can it take to come back from one measly test?

"It's barely been five minutes, Vanitas." he replied.

"Oh... well, see, I _knew_ that, but I was trying to, uh, test your sense of time. Because you're so old and all. Yeah. That's it." Vanitas stuttered.

"Yeah, you suck. Now tell me, what do you make of Ventus?" Xehanort asked.

"Dude, I've been standing behind a _wall_ a hundred feet away from the testing area the whole time. I couldn't _see_ anything from here." he pointed out.

"You were supposed to monitor the whole thing from one of your corridors of darkness!"

"...Yeah... but they would have noticed a giant black hole in the wall. Also, I forgot." he added, a bit shamefully. Xehanort gave him a glare. "But I can still make it up to you! I'll go spy on Ventus right now!"

"Good. And make it snappy!" he demanded.

"Yes, sir!" Vanitas replied, quickly opening a dark corridor and walking through it.

He barely got twelve feet into the corridor when he stopped. "...What was I supposed to be doing, again?" he wondered aloud. "...Eh, whatever. I guess I'll just go and give creepy messages to that Ventus guy the Master's so obsessed with. Yeah. Let's go do that."

He made a point to keep reminding himself of that as he continued to walk down the corridor towards Ven's room.

* * *

Ventus was in his room, following Terra's example and seeking isolation from the others. Hey, if it worked for Terra, then by default, it would work for Ven, too. Or at least, that was the logic he was following for now.

In reality, he was just bored because Aqua didn't want to have conversations with anyone because she was busy with something vague. Which left Ven with no one to hang out with. Even Master Eraqus had gone off to who-knows-where, and in any case, he never much liked the master. He had terrible taste in muffins.

So, he just lay there, swinging his old, wooden Keyblade back and forth, imagining that it was a butterfly. He would have used his own, rather than his old practice blade, but it had originally belonged to Terra, so that made it easier to see as a butterfly.

He jolted upwards, snapping out of his daydream, and letting out a yelp as he heard bells ring out far away. _Oh, it's just the lunch bell_ , he thought, calming himself down a bit. He dragged himself out of bed and was about to leave him room when he heard a FWOOSH sound.

He spun around, wondering if the angels had finally come for him, to see a black hole open itself on his bedroom wall. A mysterious figure emerged from it, stumbling as he came.

"Ugh, jeez. That is the _last_ time I take a mile walk through a shadow rave party. Friggin' bugs tried to burn me as a witch… oh." He looked up, finally noticing Ven, who was giving him a look of alarm. "Ahem. Hey, there." He said awkwardly.

"WHO ARE YOU." Ven demanded. "HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE. ARE YOU TRYING TO TAKE ME TO THE AFTERLIFE?!"

"Whoa, whoa! Chill, you blonde pinecone! Do you _want_ what little security this castle has to ruin your bedroom?!" the mysterious figure exclaimed. Ventus blinked.

"Well, no, but…"

"Good. That means we can actually have a conversation."

"Uh, okay. About what?" Ven asked, quickly becoming used to the fact that a complete stranger had just waltzed into his room through a magic hole in the wall.

"Terra." The stranger declared.

"Terra?"

"Yes, Terra."

"What about Terra?" Ven asked.

"He's evil."

"Who, Terra?"

"Yes, Terra!"

"Terra's not evil, though." Ven pointed out. Vanitas sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought.

"Well, maybe he's not evil right now, but he's going to be. In fact, he's probably going on his merry way right now, leaving this world and into another, slowly embracing the darkness that's growing in his heart, and there's _nothing you or your swirly hair can do about it._ " He said, trying to sound as ominous as possible. "By the time you catch up to him, he'll be a different person… one who's _evil._ " He added, putting extra emphasis on the word 'evil'.

"Nah, he still wouldn't be evil." Ven replied dismissively. This irked Vanitas greatly.

"W-why not?!" he demanded.

"Because he's wonderful. A little easily manipulated, I guess, but really, he's the greatest!" Ven said, smiling at the thought of Terra's wonderful big brother attitude. Ven couldn't see it, but Vanitas had a puzzled look on his face.

"How do you know he's easily manipulated?" he asked.

"Because there was this one time, when I couldn't reach the asparagus eggs from the shelf, and Terra was busy training, so I had to cleverly weasel him into getting it for me. He never realized he had stopped training!" he giggled a little at the thought, once again admiring just how _tall_ Terra was. Vanitas, thinking on a similar wavelength, frowned a little in distaste.

"Ah, yeah, I hate trying to grab things from a shelf. It's like whoever designed kitchens had some vendetta against short people. Do you know how humiliating it is to be so powerful, yet you can't get a simple box of baking powder from your own cupboard? It's a nightmare!" he remarked. Ven laughed a little.

"Ha, yeah. Being short kind of sucks sometimes. It's great for fighting—"

"—Especially since it makes you harder to hit—"

"—But by the end of the day…" Ven trailed off before starting again, Vanitas joining him as they said in unison,

"… _You still need to ask a tall person to help you reach the biscuits._ "

They stared at each other for a moment, Ven a little surprised, but happy that he found someone who thought so similarly to him, and Vanitas feeling like a complete moron for acting friendly with the enemy. He also felt like he had completely derailed from his initial intention when he came here, but he couldn't remember what it was.

Then it hit him.

"B-but anyways, you be sure to keep an eye on Terra. He still going to turn to the dark si—"

RING, RING, RING, RING…

"Oh, that's the lunch bell! I've gotta go eat!" Ven exclaimed. Vanitas's interest was sparked as well, knowing that he could really go for some lunch right now. After all, Xehanort never fed him anything, so most of his diet consisted of stolen junk food and Pepsis.

"Ooooh, food? I WANNA EAT THE FOOD—no. No, no, no. I, uh, actually have to leave now. Bye." He said awkwardly before opening another hole in the wall and disappearing through it.

Ventus decided it was probably best to shrug the whole thing off and head to the cafeteria.

* * *

Terra sat outside on the bottom of the castle staircase, thinking. It wasn't often that he had to re-think the inner workings of his heart, and he found it to be much more difficult than he had initially thought. For instance, he vaguely understood that "darkness" was something that sat around in people's hearts, but he wasn't entirely sure what it did. But presumably, his heart had darkness in it. What did that mean, anyways? He was an expert on honor, glory, and making pie, and he was fairly certain none of those things had to do with darkness.

All of this deep inner monologue-ing was giving him a headache. _Maybe darkness is the cause of headaches_ , he thought. He thought back to the magnesium fire on his arm from earlier. Where had that come from, anyway?

It was at that moment that Terra realized that he was really bad at putting things together. He had been thinking for over ten minutes now, and he actually understood _less_ of why he was unworthy than before. He just knew that he was angry at the thought of being unworthy of _anything_.

"I wonder if I should see a counselor…" he wondered out loud.

"You're fine as you are," a voice replied unexpectedly, "What would you need a counselor for?"

Terra quickly stood up and turned around, relaxing when he saw Master Xehanort.

"Oh, Master Xehanort. I didn't hear you there. Such is the result of your stealthy, covert operations Master Eraqus had told me about!" he replied, trying to smile and sound normal.

"Answer the question, meathead." Came Xehanort's reply.

"Oh, um… I've been re-thinking the inner workings of my heart lately," he started, deciding to be honest, "and I've realized that there's a lot about it I don't understand. Darkness, for example. I was thinking a counselor could help me with figuring out what it does and why it's presumably bad."

"Wow, you're dense."

"…Excuse me?"

"You think a counselor can help you understand your heart, but a counselor wouldn't know you. How would they know any more about your heart than you do?" Xehanort explained.

"Well, they're experts in psychology, which is related to the heart in some fashion, and given how little _I_ know about my own heart, I figured—" Terra tried to explain, but was then interrupted by Xehanort.

"Well, you figured wrong!" he snapped, "The darkness cannot be destroyed…"

"I wasn't suggesting that it could," Terra pointed out.

"…It can only be channeled!" Xehanort finished, paying almost no attention to Terra, who gave him a befuddled look.

"I don't suppose it was something from my classes that I've failed to learn?" he wondered.

"Terra, I could go on for _hours_ about all the things you didn't learn from class, but that's not why I'm here. I'm here to tell you that—"

RING, RING, RING, RING…

Upon hearing the bell, Terra automatically looked towards the castle, feeling as though the bells were calling him to a destiny far greater than himself, an epic journey to be fulfilled, a battle in which he would be the sole victor. He got this impression from many things, but he especially felt it from the bells. His mind set on this newfound opportunity for glory, he completely forgot about Master Xehanort and began running up the stairs, going towards the sound of the bell.

* * *

"…and once the entire dimension is effectively turned into a desolate wasteland, it is your duty that you—"

RING, RING, RING, RING…

"…I'm not the only one who heard that, right?" Aqua asked, just to make sure she hadn't gone insane from listening to Eraqus give her extremely convoluted orders for so long. Thankfully, her suspicions were proven wrong when Eraqus noticed the sound, too, and turned his attention to a glowing gemstone on the wall.

Terra suddenly rushed to her side, panting from running so long, yelling at the top of his lungs.

"WHAT HAPPENED?! HAS THERE BEEN A DEMON INVASION?! A LOSS OF ALL NONEXISTENT ELECTRICITY?! _AN EXTREMELY POINTLESS SCUFFLE?!_ " he shrieked. Aqua sighed.

"I don't know," came her intelligent answer.

"Well, you should _start_ knowing!" he retorted.

As Aqua got in a debate with Terra about the possibility of someone inexplicably gaining knowledge, Eraqus approached the glowing gemstone and saw that his other friend, Yen Sid, had called him.

"Eraqus." Was all he said.

"This really isn't a good time, Yen," he said in an exasperated tone, "I'm _kind_ of busy instructing the new Keyblade Master of things that will hopefully be useful at the end of this game. If you have something to say, say it now before you take too long and I slowly lose what little sanity I have left."

There was a long pause. Terra's and Aqua's bickering could be heard in the background, getting more heated as time dragged on.

"…You must inform them of the plot." Yen Sid said.

"That would be a lot easier if I knew what the plot was, Yenny."

"… … I will explain… … … … everything." He replied slowly.

* * *

While Yen Sid took roughly three hours to explain the very small amount of information he wanted Eraqus to pass on to Aqua and Terra, Ven was busy running around the castle, trying to remember where the cafeteria was and why they never had a lunch bell before.

At the same time, Vanitas was trying really, _really_ hard to avoid another Heartless rave party.

"If I have to listen to one more gothic disco song about baking cake, I swear to God, _I will freaking lose my mind._ " He complained.

Then he heard it.

" _First you try measure all the flour, flour,_

 _Then you try put it into a bowl, a bowl,_

 _Then you try measure all the sugar, sugar…"_

"AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Vanitas screamed.

* * *

"Okay, you two…" Eraqus began, rubbing his temples as he approached them, "…Stop fighting and listen to some exposition."

Terra and Aqua, who had practically gotten into a wrestling match, quickly stopped trying to attack each other and stood before Eraqus once again.

"Alright… so, my buddy Yen Sid just called and told me that the Princesses of Heart are in danger. And not just from the evil forces of evil darkness, but also from something that's almost exactly the same, but different."

"What does that mean?" Aqua asked.

"I don't know; he didn't specify because I told him not to take up too much time."

"But, Master, it's been almost three hours," Terra pointed out.

"Yeah… for something as important as this, I'm surprised it didn't take eight. He's not exactly known for being the quickest-spoken man in the multiverse." He explained. "Anyhow, since you two are Keyblade wielders, I want you to defeat the not-quite-dark-forces, called the "Unversed", before they can do something bad to the Princesses of Heart. Also, I tried to tell Xehanort about this, but he didn't answer my calls. He never answers my calls…

"Now, since I opened the Gateways to the other worlds, you can go through them with your magic armor. Now, go! And make sure you don't die." He turned his attention to Terra. "And if you can complete this task, Terra, I _might_ consider making you a Master, okay?"

At this, Terra's face beamed and he gave a confident smile.

"YES, MASTER!" he exclaimed, running off immediately. Eraqus sighed.

Aqua started to follow Terra, only to see Ven rush by in a blur of blonde and grey.

"THE CAFETERIA IS _DEFINITELY_ IN THIS DIRECTION! _I CAN FEEL IT!_ " he yelled as he ran by.

"Well, that was weird." Aqua remarked.

"Hey, Aqua, do me a favor." Eraqus said suddenly.

"You mean _aside_ from the one where you want me to demolish my home world?" she replied sarcastically.

"Yes. If Terra does too many stupid things, especially involving darkness, bring him back to me, pronto."

"Sure thing, Master-dude."

Eraqus gave her a look.

"…That sounded weird." she said awkwardly.

* * *

As Ven ran down the corridor, hoping that maybe _this time_ he had found the right one to the cafeteria, he found himself running outside, stumbling down a staircase.

 _Just my luck,_ he thought bitterly. Then he realized that he actually _was_ lucky when he found Terra standing in the middle of the stone pavement.

" _TERRAAAA!_ " he yelled, catching Terra's attention right before he reached the clearing and plowed right into him. Terra, who had a strong build and knew how to keep his balance, managed to keep himself steady while Ven recoiled from the impact and landed on the floor. He quickly stood back up, his face panicked.

"I-i-it was horrible—and I-I couldn't find— _so m-many hallways_ —" he sputtered, trying to make sense of all the insanity he had just gone through trying to find the food. He stopped talking when Terra ruffled his already messy hair and smiled.

"It's okay, Ven," he said, trying to be comforting despite having no idea what Ven was talking about. "Don't worry about whatever it is you're worrying about; I'll be back in a bit."

That confused Ventus greatly.

"Wait, you're going somewhere-?" he started, but he couldn't continue because he was busy being astonished by what was happening before his eyes.

Terra punched the orb on his shoulder pad and was suddenly covered in light. Undergoing a transformation sequence similar to that of the ones shown in Sailor Moon, he came out of the sequence covered in elaborate, form-fitting armor. Opening a giant wormhole in the sky with his Keyblade, he tossed the said Keyblade about a hundred feet in the air, and when it came back, it was an elaborate motorcycle of sorts. He jumped on it and drove it into the huge wormhole in the sky.

Ven just stared for a while.

"…Whoa…" he said. "That was so… _awesome!_ I have _got_ to try that!"

Slamming his palm onto his own shoulder pad, he, too, underwent a transformation sequence. When he was finished, he took the time to admire just how _amazing_ he looked in his newfound armor.

He then twirled in place and, with the skills of a ballerina, spun his Keyblade around and threw it like a baton into the air. When it came back, it was the most awesome-looking air board he had ever laid eyes on. He jumped, spun around like Sonic the Hedgehog, and landed on the air board with amazing grace. He, too, disappeared into the vortex.

"VEN, GET BACK HERE!" Aqua yelled, convinced that Ven was going to do something stupid as she watched him fly into the wormhole. Eraqus shared her outrage.

"THAT MORON HAD BETTER GET BACK HERE BEFORE I KILL HIM!" he shouted. "Aqua, get him back here before he hurts himself!" he commanded, convinced that Aqua was the only one out of his three pupils with any sort of capability.

"Right!" she agreed, also convinced that a young one like Ven was helpless in the outside dimension.

After going under yet another transformation sequence, turning her Keyblade into a flying bike of some kind, she flew after her two best friends.

Little did they all know what they were getting into.

* * *

 **Author's Notes: THIRTEEN PAGES. MY GOD. THIS TOOK SO LONG TO WRITE.**

 **Also, I feel I should mention that I don't really ship the canon versions of Terra and Aqua. But then again, these aren't the canon versions of Terra and Aqua. Plus, the amount of shippy moments between these two is going to be so small, it almost doesn't count as a pairing. So, that's why the description says "No pairings". If you do ship Terra and Aqua, then great! If you don't, then that's fine, too.**

 **But, on another note, I'm really happy with how this turned out. It's phenomenally long, but I had fun writing it, and I hope you all enjoyed reading it! :)**

 **EDIT: Also, I just re-read this entire story, and I have to say, as proud as I am of how it turned out... it just doesn't seem right for it to end here on chapter 3. So, in order to satisfy my ABSOLUTE NEED for there to be a "Next" button at the bottom of this page, I'm going to try to start on the fourth chapter as soon as I have the time. So the fourth chapter MIGHT come out sooner than this one did. I'll do my best! :D**


	4. Terra-Centric

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Kingdom Hearts; it belongs to Disney and Square Enix. All characters, locations, and plot points shown here all belong to their original owners.**

 **This chapter came out really quickly, like jeez. What is wrong with me.**

 **Wrote this all in one sitting; hope you like it! :D**

* * *

In the middle of a forest, there was only calm. Birds chirped, the waterfalls splashed eternally, and there were extremely few clouds in the sky. It may have been the most peaceful, undisturbed place in the entire multiverse.

But of course, it wouldn't be peaceful for very long.

With an earth-shattering quake that didn't actually shatter any earth, a hole in space-time erupted in the middle of this serene environment. The birds either flew away or chirped at the top of their lungs in rage, wondering who the monstrosity that had interrupted their nap was and how easy they would be to kill.

Emerging from the hole in space-time (that, by all means, should have destroyed the worlds as we know them) was a red-and-gold armored figure. The enraged birds' first thoughts were something along the lines of, "Heh, I can totally take on this low-level abomination."

When the figure suddenly started glowing, casting off the armor in an amazing showcase of magical sparkles, however, the birds suddenly thought something even closer to, "WHAT KIND OF SORCERY IS THIS, WHY DID I THINK I COULD CHALLENGE SUCH A MAJESTIC ANGEL. I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE AND BACK TO THE WORLD THAT MAKES SENSE."

Emerging from the incredible display of sparkles was none other than Terra, who was feeling so amazingly epic and fulfilled, he almost forgot why he even came here.

" _HUZZAH!_ " he exclaimed, scaring off what little wildlife had been brave enough to hang around long enough to hear him. "I HAVE SUCCESSFULLY EMERGED FROM THE FIRST TEST OF MY UNBREAKABLE SPIRIT: FIVE HOURS OF WANDERING LOST IN A WORLD BETWEEN WORLDS, SEARCHING FOR THE LIGHT OF DAY WITHIN THE DARKNESS!" he paused for a few moments, allowing himself to breathe before carrying on. "Now that I have emerged triumphant, it is my DESTINY that I go forth and explore this new-found world!"

But before he could make any steps further, he heard a strange sound behind him. It sounded to him like a mixture of a popping sound and something more akin to a FWOOSH. He quickly turned around, summoning his Keyblade in a defensive stance, ready for anything to come at him. "WHO DOTH DARE TO APPROACH ONE SUCH AS I IN SUCH A COWARDLY MANNER?!" he roared.

Seeing that the source of the sound was the seemingly random spawning of an extremely tiny monster, Terra couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. He knew better than to judge an opponent based off of appearance, but this thing just looked downright ridiculous. And that wasn't just because of the fact that it was puny and harmless-looking; it was _dancing_.

It shuffled back and forth, bobbed its small head up and down to non-existent music, and Terra could have sworn it pulled off a few breakdance moves.

Reminding himself that dancers, no matter how strange, required a lot of bodily strength and agility to be successful, he thought of how dangerous this thing could be if it put those skills to an offensive use.

' _Tis a shame that there's only one, though,_ he thought to himself. _If there were more, then I could put all my training to the test and—_

As if the universe was reading his mind, several more of the breakdancing creatures were summoned around him. His face stretched into a wild grin. "Now, that's what I'm talking about! Now, little creatures that I'm assuming are Unversed, PREPARE TO MEET YOUR DOOM!" he let out a hearty laugh as he swung his Keyblade in several arcs of pure, focused might. The little ones weren't much of a challenge, sadly, but more spawned soon enough.

* * *

After a glorious battle against creatures he had only assumed based on a rough guess were his enemies, he was prepared to walk away happily, whistling a victory tune as he made his way to… somewhere else. But then he heard an almost inaudible shuffle behind him, causing him to spin around again to see that one of his enemies was escaping. "Ooooh, no you don't. You shalt not escape from the mighty Terra so easily, muffincakes! I'M GONNA HUNT YOU _DOWN!_ "

After about half an hour of chasing the little monster down, (Terra was never known for being a very fast runner) he slew the fiend with a mighty Jump Attack!

"Ha-HAH!" he exclaimed. "Another one down, courtesy of the one and only me-me!" he stopped praising himself when he saw that he was looking directly at a somewhat far-off castle, one much different than the one he was used to. For instance, this one was much more blue than the one back home, which favored gold and lavender above all else.

It was then that he noticed a tall, black-robed figure standing not far from where he was. Deciding that since this was the only other sentient being he had come across so far, it would be best to talk to this man—or woman, whichever they were.

"Approaching the person, he called out, "Pardon me, sir or madam! I wish to speak with you for a reason that has yet to be defined!"

Not exactly the best conversation-starter he could have come up with, but give the guy a break. He hadn't met anyone new in four years, and all things considered, he had _vastly_ improved since then. For instance, this new person didn't pass out from a brain overload just by being in his general presence this time.

…It was a start.

The person turned around to look at him, revealing their face to very much be that of a woman. A suspicious, manipulative, haunting face that looked like it ought to be laughing over the crumpled remains of a once-prosperous kingdom, sure, but a woman's face nonetheless.

Hey, was it really Terra's place to judge her right now? He had known Xehanort for years, and in some ways, he had a more sinister-looking face than this fellow, and even laughed maniacally at random intervals, but he had still proven himself to be _completely_ trustworthy.

So, he didn't judge.

"Now who in the world could _you_ be, puny morsel?" she asked in a voice that sounded like it was trying to sound innocent and kind, but there was _definitely_ a bit of disgust in her voice when she reached the "puny morsel" part of that sentence.

Having been called much worse by friend and foe alike, Terra quickly shrugged off the telltale signs of an insincere jerk and answered her question with cheer and a formal bow.

"My name is Terra, madam, the apprentice of the glorious Master Eraqus! Might I ask for your name?" he asked in return. He was trying to sound as polite as possible since this person looked like she was in a high position and being rude hadn't gone well the last time he met someone new.

That, plus the fact that he was just a natural gentleman.

The new person finally spoke up: "Your presence sickens the mighty I, the one known as Maleficent!" the stranger declared. "And if I weren't so intrigued by the fact you're not dead, I would banish you to the Shadow Realm where you stand!"

Okay, so maybe this Maleficent character wasn't quite as polite as he'd hoped. But he wasn't going to let that stop him. Stop him from doing what, he wasn't quite sure yet. But he was Terra! No measly obstacle of shady, impolite strangers was going to stop him from doing anything!

Deciding that the best approach now was to ask for information, (since Master Eraqus hadn't given him any details on his mission) he stopped bowing and replied,

"Quite the interesting statement there, Ms. Maleficent. But allow me to inquire most boldly: would you, by some miracle of a chance, know something about those monsters that attacked me?"

"You must take me for a fool, brunette," she snapped, "I was not in the vicinity when you were attacked, how can you expect me to know what you're talking about?!"

That had Terra stumped.

"I… just assumed," was all he could come up with. Maleficent glared at him.

"Yes, well, you can just take all of your emotionally primitive _assumptions_ with you when you take a hike!" she yelled. Terra quickly became confused.

"A hike? To where?" he wondered aloud. Maleficent was quickly starting to think that maybe she should just kill this boy right then and there; she had spent a grand total of two minutes with him and he was already proving himself to be dumber than anyone she had ever known.

Except for maybe that bald fellow. That guy _really_ took the cake as far as idiot foreigners went.

She somehow refrained from murdering the brunette on the spot and settled for a death glare instead.

"Is _everyone_ who comes here going to be as dense and inhumanly clueless as that bald elf?!" she exclaimed.

That got Terra's attention.

"A bald elf? One with a white beard and gold eyes, perhaps?" he inquired.

"Yes, yes, _what difference does it make?!_ The guy couldn't stop ranting on and on about some "light"—if he wasn't so annoyingly powerful I'd have killed him the first chance I had!" she ranted.

Terra was suddenly flooded with the overwhelming sense that, at some point in the future, a very similar sentiment was going to be aimed towards his Master's friend by someone with phenomenally bad anger management issues. Someone blonde, he concluded.

How he thought of any of that was beyond both him and the eternal wisdom of the Information Bar, and that scared him a little.

He suddenly snapped back to reality at the thought of Maleficent somehow knowing Xehanort.

"Wait, can you tell me where you last saw him? I have to find him if he's here! MY CONSCIENCE DEMANDS IT!" he shouted. Maleficent, already tired of this kid by now, was thankful for any excuse to get him out of her sight, so she said,

"Ugh, fine. The giant, looming castle behind me is where I saw him last. He's probably trying to find Princess Aurora or something. Now leave." she added with a cold glare. "You can get to the castle by crossing this bridge we're standing on right now." Terra smiled happily in return.

"Then I shall be off to the castle, then! AND I SHALL MAKE A POINT TO REMEMBER THE NAME AURORA!" he shouted as he dashed off to the castle.

 _Finally,_ Maleficent thought. _Now I can be rid of that moron with the stupid pants once and for all._ But then it occurred to her that maybe she could insert a plot point by using this fluffy-haired idiot.

Inserting sudden and only halfway necessary plot points just happened to be her forte, so she teleported away in a wisp of green smoke to wait for the kid to catch up to her.

* * *

As it turned out, crossing the bridge was a lot more difficult and time-consuming than Terra had initially thought.

For starters, Unversed kept spawning out of nowhere, forcing Terra to follow his battle-hungry instinct and eliminate every single one he could get his hands on, something that proved to be annoyingly tedious. Now, Terra was always up for a good fight, but there was just something about fighting waves of really, really weak enemies that made him feeling unfulfilled.

What he needed was a boss; a real fighter who could match his level of strength!

But hey, if he had to defeat the small, weak Unversed to get to the big one, then that made the whole thing ten times more worthwhile to him.

When he finally entered the castle, he took a few moments to admire the plaid carpet and then proceeded to slay about fifty more Unversed before heading into a long, green, arguably creepy hallway.

And what did he do after that?

He killed even more Unversed. Where were these things even coming from?! (Terra didn't care that much, but really, you had to wonder.)

Struggling to remember which way was left after doing so many mid-air somersaults, he found himself stumbling into what he was pretty certain was a bedroom after unlocking a barrier on a door.

He blinked a few times.

Was it just him, or was there somebody else in there?

He looked to his left (reminding himself that left was left, and _not_ a figment of his imagination) to see a girl resting peacefully in her bed. He took a double-take.

Where was he, again?

Oh, right. A bedroom. Duh. That's why someone was sleeping. In the afternoon. Yes. That made sense.

He approached the bed, noticing that the person sleeping was blonde and wore makeup. Those were pretty much the only features that stood out to him, honestly.

"For some inexplicable reason, this all seems incredibly familiar…" he muttered. Vaguely wondering what prompted such a random statement and why he kept getting strange impressions from or about blonde people, he heard someone say something behind him.

"Everything about you is inexplicable." Terra whipped his head around to find the source of the voice. It was Maleficent! "And I say that having known you for barely five minutes."

"Maleficent!" Terra exclaimed. "What are you doing here?" he paused. "… _How_ did you get here?"

"I'm here to abduct the princess's soul, why _else_ would I be here?" she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the universe. "And I got here through means that you are incapable of even trying to understand."

"Um… okay."

"She has a heart of pure light, you know," she continued. "Perfect for my unending dream of world domination!"

Terra blinked.

"You mean that new board game that just came out? Cause Aqua's been _dying_ to play that ever since—"

"By the way, I totally know you have a Keyblade."

Terra gasped. It was a completely over-dramatic, elongated gasp that could be heard miles away if had more… volume.

Summoning the aforementioned Keyblade on instinct, he yelled,

"HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE KEYBLADE?! DID A GENIE TELL YOU?! A GENIE TOLD YOU, DIDN'T HE?!"

Maleficent resisted the urge to facepalm.

"If you want to know so badly, take princess Aurora's heart and give it to me." She replied, overcoming her exasperation and replacing it with and epic smirk. Terra just looked alarmed.

"Whoa, _whoa!_ That's kind of morbid for a K+ fanfiction, don't you think?!" he blurted, panicking to the point of hysteria. One of Maleficent's eyebrows twitched in irritation.

"No, you moron! I was talking about her soul!" she yelled, frustrated at how long this was taking.

"Oh… why didn't you just say that in the first place?!" Terra demanded.

"Because this game doesn't make any sense! _Deal with it!_ "

And with that, she surrounded Terra in a green, magic smoke that he could tell was threatening to take over his body. He didn't know how he knew that's what it was doing, but he never doubted any irrational thought patterns he might have.

Especially since this newfound magic was forcing him to remember the old times he had with Master Eraqus.

* * *

" _Now, remember, Terra:_ _ **darkness is the enemy.**_ _Why can't you get that?!"_ to which a young Terra would reply, _"I dunno, Master, maybe it's because you haven't told me what darkness_ _ **is**_ _yet!"_

" _Terra, pay attention in class! Do you_ _ **want**_ _to set a bad example for Ventus?!"_ and then Terra had said, _"Teach, he's brain-dead. Of_ _ **course**_ _he's not paying attention in class!"_ That had earned him a whole week in Darkness Bin.

" _Oh, Light, how I love you…If you were a person I would ask you to be my wife… or husband, either or."_ Terra had stared at him for a while after hearing that. Eraqus eventually noticed. _"…Terra, haven't I told you that staring at people with an unblinking gaze is bad?! Look at what happened to Yen Sid! Go to your room, young man, and don't come out till I say so!"_

" _Terra, how many times to I have to tell you… YOU DO NOT. EAT. SILVERWARE! I don't care if it gives you the fiery willpower to stand up against all things that seem impossible, THAT SILVERWARE IS EXPENSIVE! SHEESH!"_

" _Next time you eat nachos, Terra…_ _ **try**_ _not to use it as hair dye."_ To which he responded with, _"But being an unnatural blonde is my CALLING! Why can't you understand that?!"_ And then Eraqus had said, _"Terra, if you want to be blonde, fine. Just use ACTUAL hair dye as opposed to this liquid American Cheese you keep telling me about."_ Terra had then yelled, _"YOU CANNOT DENY THE ONE TRUE GLORY THAT IS AMERICA!"_

Come to think of it, maybe his relationship with Master Eraqus wasn't quite as loving as he'd thought…

* * *

When he suddenly stopped having flashbacks, he heard Maleficent laughing evilly.

"Yes, YES! Finally, I can finally start to achieve my goal that I won't be close to accomplishing at least ten years from now! HAHAHAHAA!"

Terra, on the other hand, was still trying to put his thoughts back together from… whatever had just happened.

"Wait… so, what just happened?" he asked. "Did you just possess me for a minute there? So… undignified… and without honor…" he mumbled, using the nearby bed as support.

"Also, I have Aurora's heart, now. Hurray for me!" Maleficent said happily, ignoring Terra completely. "Now, I wonder how I should celebrate? Maybe I'll hire some break dancers and confetti…"

Terra was a lot more occupied with the sight of Princess Aurora and how blonde she was. He was suddenly met with another, briefer flashback of seeing Ven the same way years before.

Oh. So _that's_ what this entire scenario reminded him of.

…Why was it always blondes with him today? Even Terra didn't know!

But that was the least of his concerns at the moment. Right now, he found himself thinking about the Keyblade and how Maleficent had promised him answers. Maleficent, thinking similarly to Terra, (which would have disgusted her if she knew) decided that maybe she would hold up her end of the deal. She didn't want to seem untrustworthy, right? It wasn't like possessing someone and forcing them to kidnap the very life force of someone's being proved her sinister evilness. Totally.

"Now, listen up, foolio," she began, feeling a rush of modern-day lingo hit her like a tidal wave, "since I told you I would tell you something of importance, I know about the Keyblade because of that Xehanort bloke—who I hate, by the way. And before you ask where he went, I have no freaking clue. So don't ask."

Terra, now well enough to stand up properly without the help of inanimate objects, gave her a look that meant, "Why the heck are you telling me this if you can't give me a proper direction?" Maleficent ignored the strange look she was receiving from Terra and continued monologue-ing.

"You know, we should join forces, so we can rule the worlds together by abducting the life force of six more pure-hearted girls! AAAAHAHAHAHA!" she ranted. In response, Terra summoned the Keyblade and pointed it at her.

"SUCH A THING IS NOT HONORABLE AND I SHALT NOT PARTAKE IN SUCH NON-HONORABLE KITTEN JOKES AND WORLD-CONQUERING!" he shrieked at the top of his lungs. Maleficent looked alarmed.

"…I'll take that as a "no", then." She said. Before anyone could do anything else, though, the castle shook beneath them, causing Terra to panic and Maleficent to chuckle.

And with that, she teleported away, adding a few maniacal laughing fits along the way.

"NOW YOU GET BACK HERE, MISSY!" Terra yelled, pulling off a quick spin-slice at the area where Maleficent used to be before she vanished. He was about to shout more unconvincing threats when the castle shook again. So, instead, he just yelled, "RAID! _RAID!_ MUST PROTECT THE WEST, EAST, AND SLIGHTLY DIAGONAL KEEPS!"

And so, he rushed off, preparing for a fight that he would remember long after he was finished.

* * *

It was an impressive fight, to say the least. He had to fight roughly a hundred Unversed just to get to the main room where their leader was, and that proved to be quite the challenging foe. But since nothing was ever a match for Terra except Aqua and Ven, he didn't have much of a problem defeating it.

So, he took the time to visit the now-almost-lifeless Princess Aurora to make sure she wasn't dead. She wasn't, but it was a little hard to tell when she had no soul. He shrugged. It's not like he had anything to do here, so he might as well leave.

But not before he made one last comment to her.

"You know… you really _do_ remind me of Ven back when he was a broken little fudge-muffin. _Kudos!_ " and then he left, not taking the time to think about what he was supposed to do next.

* * *

 **Author's Notes: An entire chapter dedicated to Terra... cause why not. XD Hope you all liked it!**

 **Also, yes. It's noticeably shorter than the last one, but after that last scene is a new world... and I didn't want to try to squeeze a second world in, because that would make it WAY too long.**

 **Please read & review!**


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